Today, I want to talk about how to handle other musicians telling you what to play. I’ve discussed this on here before, but I want to elaborate a little. I can think of several scenarios where someone would ask or tell you what to play. The most common one, I guess, would be if you’re in a band and someone in the band is constantly telling you what to play or how to play. If you’re a musician for hire, your job is to take direction, but there are some situations even as a musician for hire that need to be dealt with diplomatically, like when the band’s manager, who wasn’t the one that directly hired you, makes a suggestion for what you should play or in the studio when the producer and artist dont agree on what you should play.
Overall, I think it’s an issue of clear communication. I hope I would be able to set my ego aside, listen to what people have to say and calmly discuss it.
In a band situation where someone in the band is telling you what to play, first of all, I would want to be clear on how the band operates. Is there a definite leader or is this an equal democracy? Do we vote on certain issues, and how are things ultimately decided? These things can be discussed in a band meeting rather than right in the middle of a rehearsal. Actually, these are questions you can ask at the audition, even before you get the gig. That’s a start, to be clear on how this band works.
I think it’s also helpful to think through why you want to be in this band. Are you playing just for fun or do you have professional aspirations and you think this band has the potential for great success?
Every musician has a point of view, and I think ideally every member of the band should be free to make suggestions and for them to be taken into consideration, with each musician being in charge of playing their particular instrument. That’s just my take on things, but it is important to know how your particular band operates.
I think it’s good to have an open mind to consider whether someone suggestion will improve the song, and at least try the suggestion. And then you can offer your alternative.
If criticism of your playing is vague, ask for clarification as to why what you’re playing doesn’t work. Do they think it conflicts with the arrangement? Does it hurt the groove? Professionally asking for clarification is helpful, especially if the band gets a vote and the criticism seems to be coming from the same person every time. Be flexible, but self-respecting.
Ultimately, after discussing the ground rules of how the band operates, and communicating your point of view respectfully, you can make the decision if this situation is something you want to continue being a part of.
